If you can't stand yourself, neither can anybody else!
The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one.
The things I see now on TV and in movies are so outlandish. Kids doing rude things with pies! And the language that they use! It's being outrageous for the sake of being outrageous. I can't watch it. It turns me off.
Every language has its own music.
When I did comedy I made fun of myself. If there was a buffoon, I played the buffoon.
People come up to me and they thank me: 'I thank you for the many, many hours of laughter.'