Everybody wants to have a goal - I gotta get to that goal, I gotta get to that goal, I gotta get to that goal. I can finally get to that goal. Then you get to that goal, and then you gotta get to another goal. But in between goals is a thing called life, that has to be lived and enjoyed - and if you don't, you're a fool.

The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.

Jazz is a beautiful woman whose older brother is a policeman.

People come up to me and they thank me: 'I thank you for the many, many hours of laughter.'

Every language has its own music.

After all those years of doing a live, hour-and-a-half show every week, I've got nothing more I need to prove.

The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one.