I can speak Esperanto like a native.

There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

General: Where are you from? Spike: London. General: Which part? Spike: ... Well, all of me.

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.