Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light

I'm Irish. We think sideways

Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.

There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.