I may be just an empty flesh terminal reliant on technology for all my ideas, memories and relationships, but I am confident that all of that everything that makes me a unique human being is still out there somewhere, safe in a theoretical storage space owned by giant, multinational corporations.

As a rule, Germans shouldn't do comedy. Their last box office comedy was Nosferatu.

In the beginning, a monkey evolutioned gay marriage.

If women are breadwinners and men bring home the bacon, why do people complain about having no dough? I'm confused. Also hungry.

But you are also the biggest threat of all ...You are a gay person I like. Your threat is that you make being gay seem non-threatening. It's almost as if your happiness does not take mine away.

Summer movie idea: take all the sequels that are out right now, and make movies about their backstories.

Oops! I always thought PETA stood for Please Eat This Animal.