Never throw caution to the wind. It could whip back into your eyes and blind you.

Now I don't know why he's denying them habeas corpus. I can only assume the guys they got detained over there did something really unforgivable. Like remind Obama he was once a professor of Constitutional Law.

Obamacare takes effect in less than eight months. Do you realize what this means? If you go to the emergency room now, you'll be covered by the time you finally see a doctor.

Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway.

Ignorance is bliss. Oedipus ruined a great sex life by asking too many questions.

Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)

I would say laughter is the best medicine. But it's more than that. It's an entire regime of antibiotics and steroids.