You should spend more time with your families; write that novel you've always wanted to write. You know, the one about the fearless reporter who stands up to the administration. You know - fiction.

It's official. Highway patrolmen are not susceptible to the Jedi Mind Trick.

Used books are the sluts of the literary world. Passed around from person to person, spreading their pages for anyone, getting cheaper and cheaper until eventually they end up in prison.

What are the origins of dressage? Did just, one day, some young horse say to his dad, 'Dad, I don't want to charge into battle...I just wanna dance'?

It's the way our founding fathers would have wanted it, if they had founded corporations instead of just a country.

The cost of living keeps going up, although death is surprisingly affordable.

I hope people'll find out pretty quickly that the guy they saw for 10 years was my sense of humor the whole time.