Can accidentally eating halal food make you Muslim? Yes, the same way drinking a cosmo can make you gay.

Obama avoided the Vietnam draft with a letter from his family doctor diagnosing him as medically eight.

I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.

Anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news at you.

I hadn't intended to end up there. I meant to be a serious actor with a beard who wore a lot of black and wanted to share his misery with you.

Bill Moyers is everything I never aspire to be: Calm, Thoughtful, and Informative.

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!