I deliver my Truth hot and hard.

I am no fan of books. And chances are, if you're reading this, you and I share a healthy skepticism about the printed word. Well, I want you to know that this is the first book I've ever written, and I hope it's the first book you've ever read. Don't make a habit of it.

I love the truth. It's the facts I'm not a fan of.

The most common thing that real reporters say to me is, "I wish I could say what you say." What I don't understand is, why can't they say what I say, even in their own way? Does that mean they want to be able to name certain bald contradictions or hypocrisies that politicians have?

There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.

With Late Night Show I can begin the search for the real Stephen Colbert.I just hope I don't find him on Ashley Madison.

If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.