Facts matter not at all. Perception is everything. It's certainty.

John Boehner will be the new speaker unless, out of habit, he blocks his own confirmation.

If you're injecting fear into other people, then you're trying to kill their minds. You're trying to get them to stop thinking.

Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway.

Republicans: the party that brought us 'Just Say No.' First as a drug policy, then as their entire platform.

Last night, we did the Threatdown -- God, it's hard to even talk about this -- and for the first time, I didn't mention bears. It's winter, they're asleep, I didn't think it would be a problem. But today I see this in the Toronto Globe and Mail -- apparently a 700-pound polar bear showed up at a children's hockey game. I've said this before, they're after our kids -- they're tender, juicy, you don't even have to throw away the bones.

I know there are some polls out there saying this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don't pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in reality. And reality has a well-known liberal bias.