Everybody loves dogs. They're the pizza of the animal kingdom.

I'm disappointed that my own Catholic Church has decided that capital punishment is wrong. Which is pretty hypocritical if you think about it, because they wouldn't even have a religion if it wasn't for capital punishment.

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!

There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good.

If it's called THE USA Today, why is all the news from yesterday?

I believe in pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps. I believe it is possible — I saw this guy do it once in Cirque du Soleil. It was magical.

What the right-wing in the United States tries to do is undermine the press.