If a poor family falls on hard times in the woods, and no one is around to care, did it really happen?
Stephen ColbertMy guest Newt Gingrich shut down the government during the Clinton administration. I'll ask him when it's gonna start working again.
Stephen ColbertIt's much better to invite the audience to be part of your show rather than saying, "I command you to do this." The other thing is, you have to follow through. If you initiate a game and they take part, you can't stop until it reaches a mutually satisfying resolution.
Stephen ColbertYou can't swallow and think about your tongue. If you think about your tongue, you've got a giant piece of meat in your mouth and that's a terrible feeling.
Stephen ColbertEvil exists because of the disobedience of Satan. God gave Satan, and the angels, and man free will. Satan used his free will and abused it by not obeying authority. Hell was created by Satanโs disobedience to God, and his purposeful removal from Godโs loveโwhich is what hell is. Removing yourself from Godโs love. You send yourself to hell. God does not send you there.
Stephen ColbertThis is a crucial time in the fight for corporate civil rights. Just look at the hateful signs at Occupy Wallstreet: 'Corporations Are Not People!' Wow, I thought we were past the point in this country where some people aren't people just because they have different color skin or different religion or were born in a lawyer's office, only exist on paper, have no soul and can never die.
Stephen Colbert