I have always been a fan of reality by majority vote.

Corporations have free speech, but they can't speak like you and me. They don't have mouths or hands.

They think I'm silly. I do silly things. I fall down and run into things. I talk to inanimate objects. I'll hold a pickup stick to my ear and say, "What? What's that? I can't hear you

You see, we're America the Beautiful, not America 'Well, At Least She Has a Great Personality'.

I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.

Atheism, a religion dedicated to its own sense of smug superiority.

In order to be a top-tier candidate, I need 7.5 million dollars, and I currently have 0.0 million dollars.