The Yankees' Facebook page was hacked. The hacker was immediately purchased and signed to a 5 year contract with the Yankees.

I won't be doing the new show in character, so we'll all get to find out how much of him was me. I'm looking forward to it.

You don't want to just do a joke because it works - we can make a lot of jokes work - you want to do a joke because it will hopefully build into an argument.

Sixty eight percent of Republicans don't believe in evolution. On the other hand, only five percent of monkeys believe in Republicans.

brb, ttyl ok? wow, i saved a 'ton' of time with those acronyms.

Facebook stock continues to plummet. People started selling once they found out their mom bought it too.

Gravitas is the soup bone in the stew of television news.