Now we all know that Fidel Castro dressed up like Marilyn Monroe and gave JFK a case of syphilis so bad it eventually blew out the back of his head.

I don't think anybody can with a straight face say that the Russians did not set out to influence our election, and they did so.

You gotta learn to love when you're failing.... The embracing of that, the discomfort of failing in front of an audience, leads you to penetrate through the fear that blinds you. Fear is the mind killer.

It's clear that when we're this outnumbered by the creatures, we have to take a page from the British Empire and rule the lesser species through intimidation. That's why the single most important thing you can do as a human is to dominate an animal. Need more proof?Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground. I'd say that about covers it.

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

Everybody loves dogs. They're the pizza of the animal kingdom.

It's the way our founding fathers would have wanted it, if they had founded corporations instead of just a country.