If I'm doing a talk show or an interview, or pretty much anything where I can't control the context, I'm loath to do the character.
Stephen ColbertI am down with the latest trends. And everyone knows, the thing on the streets is vampires. So I have been biting people on the neck.
Stephen ColbertA mother needs to be in the home even when the kids arenโt. A messy house sends a coded message to children: โIโm not loveable. Otherwise Mother would dust.
Stephen ColbertIf I had free time to go to Los Angeles to shoot a movie, I would rather spend it with my kids.
Stephen ColbertI have two last pieces of advice. First, being pre-approved for a credit card does not mean you have to apply for it. And lastly, the best career advice I can give you is to get your own TV show. It pays well, the hours are good, and you are famous. And eventually some very nice people will give you a doctorate in fine arts for doing jack squat.
Stephen Colbert