Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)
Stephen ColbertRepublicans and nerds have so much in common -- they both live in fantasy worlds and have no idea how to relate to women.
Stephen ColbertCynicism is an enormous problem. I'm actually a hopeful person. But the way to stay hopeful is to acknowledge and to not accept what is absolutely amoral, mentally ill behavior as normal.
Stephen Colbert