John Boehner will be the new speaker unless, out of habit, he blocks his own confirmation.

Al Gore has a hit movie called 'An Inconvenient Truth.' I have an inconvenient truth for him: you're still not the president. ... This past weekend, Al Gore's movie, 'An Inconvenient Truth,' earned more per screen than any film in the country. ... I dare say Gore's movie is the highest grossing PowerPoint presentation in history. ... Global warming: Can we live with it? ... It is time we did something, namely resign ourselves to doing nothing [on screen: Follow Congress' Lead]. ... For instance, when sea levels rise, we'll just build levees [on screen: Worked for New Orleans]

I scream, you scream, we all scream... for the truth.

It's a game. That's why we call it 'the news.' It's just a game.

I don't think anybody can with a straight face say that the Russians did not set out to influence our election, and they did so.

On this show, your voice will be heard in the form of my voice.

Remember, Jesus would rather constantly shame gays than let orphans have a family.