Every night on my show, The Colbert Report, I speak straight from the gut, okay? I give people the truth, unfiltered by rational argument. I call it "The No Fact Zone.

I'm fascinated that people drawn to cults want to know what to do. And people want to know what to think. And people want to know how to feel. Not just what to feel but how to feel.

Liberals want to burn the flag, but progressives just want to microwave it?

Shamelessness is a wonderful part of the character.

I won't be doing the new show in character, so we'll all get to find out how much of him was me. I'm looking forward to it.

I hope people'll find out pretty quickly that the guy they saw for 10 years was my sense of humor the whole time.

Isn't an agnostic just an atheist without balls?