You have a firm grasp of the obvious.

If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.

Protect yourself from Muslim vampires by making your neck non-halal.

Anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news at you.

I welcome opposing viewpoints, but I should warn you that you'll be facing off against the 2nd-place finisher at the 1981 Charleston County High-School Debate Tournament. And whatever became of that county champ who argued in favor of tractor safety modifications? Last time I checked, she didn't have her own show.

The skinnification of America's jeanscape has gone too far.

God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he's never on welfare in a mysterious way.