I don't want someone shoving his views down my throat, unless they're covered in a crunchy candy shell.

If we don't cut expensive things like Head Start, child nutrition programs, and teachers, what sort of future are we leaving for our children?

On this show, your voice will be heard in the form of my voice.

If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.

If I'm doing a talk show or an interview, or pretty much anything where I can't control the context, I'm loath to do the character.

I tell a lot of young performers, 'Go get in trouble. Go commit yourself to something you're not sure you can do.' And I followed my own advice.

I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.