Performing music is a way to do comedy, but without the obligation to do a solid hour, hour and half of a standup. I could intersperse it with music, so it became a really good format for me.

I believe in eight of the ten commandments. I believe in going to church every Sunday... unless there's a game on.

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might be.

When the person beside you is making you alert and keen and the idea of being with anyone else is not imaginable.

Stand-up life is really hard. At one point, I got so paralyzed I could write five screenplays before I could write three jokes for stand-up. Later, I've finally allowed myself to relax quite a bit, to think I can do it because I've done it in the past. The pressure to come up with the material is the same but the anxiety about whether I can do it is gone.