If you've got a dollar and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've got 71 cents left; But if you've got seventeen grand and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've still got seventeen grand. There's a math lesson for you.

Comedy is a distortion of what is happening, and there will always be something happening.

He never complicates a desire by overthinking it, unlike Mirabelle, who spins a cocoon around an idea until it is immobile.

I will do anything to look like him - except, of course, exercise or eat right.

She looked down again and I was stymied. I sat. Oh, this was enough to make me love her, because I was right with her, understanding every second and longing to step in. I didn’t even need to know the specific that was troubling her, because to me her halting voice easily stood for the general woe that hangs in the air, even on life’s happiest days.

The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.

Why sip from a tea cup, when you can drink from the river.