If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

Women... can't live with 'em...... can't shoot 'em

I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be. I called someone. They went "Aaaaahhhh..."

Good jokes are gems. A good idea is hard to come by. I couldn't give them to someone else, even for money. It just wouldn't seem right.

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

Even snakes are afraid of snakes.

I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.