If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, 'What for?' I said, 'I'm going to buy some sugar.'

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.

The sun never sets on the British Empire. But it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.

I went for a walk last night and she asked me how long I was going to be gone. I said, 'The whole time.

I went to the hardware store to buy some batteries, but they weren't included, so I had to buy them again.