Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.

History tends to change people who think they're changing it.

Nothing I can say or devise, and nothing anybody else can say or devise, is going to be perfect.

I try to make computers say things like You have 60 seconds to achieve safe distance.

HOROSCOPE: Today is a good time for making new friends. A good deed may have unforeseen consequences. Don’t upset any druids. You will soon be going on a very strange journey. Your lucky food is small cucumbers. People pointing knives at you are probably up to no good. PS, we really mean it about the druids.

His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.

The thing is, I mean, there’s times when you look at the universe and you think, “What about me?” and you can just hear the universe replying, “Well, what about you?”