I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children.

All men like to think that they can do it alone, but a real man knows that there no substitute for support , encouragement or a pit crew.

A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

I'm actually more of a cat guy than a dog person because I travel so much. I love cats.

Playing golf is like going to a strip joint. After 18 holes you are tired and most of your balls are missing.

Pere Noel. Babbo Natale. Pelznickel. Topo Gigio