My comedy is not mine. It's a gift. I'm not that smart.

I know it sounds odd, but I want to make a Rolex-quality screwdriver.

Jill, we became parents so we could tell our kids what to do. Otherwise we're just the tallest people living here.

Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.

A car crossed two lanes of traffic, flipped, and landed on my dad's car. I don't blame cars. My dad loved cars. I don't have many memories of my dad. The love of cars is all I have of him, really.

Why go to a church to worship God? A church is man made. God never said, "And let there be aluminum siding." Climbing a tree to talk to God sounds like a better idea since only God can make a tree. And if that tree's on a golf course, all the better.

There is no greater feeling than when a groom turns to see his bride and has tears in his eyes because she is so beautiful.