Now did you know if a stick insect laid it's eggs in a jar of Bovril it will give birth to a litter of twiglets.

My mate asked me "What do you think of voluntary work?" I said "I wouldn't do it if you paid me."

So I was getting into my car and this bloke says to me, 'Can you give me a lift?' I said, 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it!'

Now you know those trick candles that you blow out and a couple of seconds.

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red.

This policeman came up to me with a pencil and a piece of very thin paper. He said, "I want you to trace someone for me."

Now did you know if a stick insect laid it's eggs in a jar of Bovril it will give birth to a litter of twiglets.