There’s nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it’s basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly.

Luck, like a Russian car, generally only works if you push it.

New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try.

I try and do 2,500 words a day, every day of the year

Mostly I sit at home in the evenings watching the box and hoping that one day I'll evolve into plankton.

Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.