I always sit in the tail end of a plane, always. You never hear of an plane backing into a mountain.

I always sit in the tail end of a plane, always. You never hear of an plane backing into a mountain.

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'

A jump lead walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost 3 days already.

A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time' The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'.

Two cannibals eating a clown. One asks the other, 'Does this taste funny to you?'