I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost 3 days already.

A jump lead walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

I used to be indecisive but now I am not quite sure

My dog was barking at everyone the other day. Still, what can you expect from a cross-breed.

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.'

I went window shopping today! I bought four windows.