A guy walks into a pub with a lump of asphalt on His shoulder, He says to the bar man give us a pint and one for the road.

A guy walks into a pub with a lump of asphalt on His shoulder, He says to the bar man give us a pint and one for the road.

And an airplane of spittle dived into the sea, there were no salivas.

So a lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a train-load of terrapins, I thought "That's a turtle disaster".

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds". I said "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

I always sit in the tail end of a plane, always. You never hear of an plane backing into a mountain.

Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'