This may come as a shock to some of you, but I have a slightly volatile personality. I don’t suffer fools well.

I love women, I love alcohol, and I love combining the two. If God invented anything better than drunk sex with a hot girl, he kept it to himself.

Leave it up to hipster nerds to pretend to hate something that they actually want

You show me a truly funny girl who doesn't have emotional issues, and I'll introduce you to my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun jockeys.

And I’ve found that, what I now want the most in a woman is—I want a partner. I want someone who is my partner in life. Who supports me, and I support her. I can share all my experiences in life with her, and she can share hers back with me. Not only do we love each other, but we accept, embrace, nurture, and care for each other.

The great stories go to those who aren't afraid to live them

At some point in their life, everyone thinks they should go to law school. You may in fact think you want to go to law school now.