Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.
I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck
I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.