I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.

I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.

I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine

Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.

I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.

A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.