A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .

I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.

No one likes the fellow who is all rogue, but we'll forgive him almost anything if there is warmth of human sympathy underneath his rogueries. The immortal types of comedy are just such men.

Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.

Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.

Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.