Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
The best thing to break is a contract.
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.