A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
W. C. FieldsMy main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. FieldsI once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful; contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.
W. C. Fields