A man who overindulges lives in a dream. He becomes conceited. He thinks the whole world revolves around him; and it usually does.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

The low-ceiling price bazaar for sexual relief was a street called Middie Alley. You could barely get a pushcart through this avenue. Top price-twenty-five cents.

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck

There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it.

Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.