There are better things than sex, but nothing quite like it.
A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.