Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch.

I was married once--in San Francisco. I haven't seen her for many years. The great earthquake and fire in 1906 destroyed the marriage certificate. There's no legal proof. Which proves that earthquakes aren't all bad.

I like children. If they're properly cooked.

Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach.

First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.

Sex isn't necessary. You don't die without it, but you can die having it.