My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.

So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.

It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.

I don't drink anymore, on the other hand I don't drink any less either.