I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.

I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise.

In every big city there is always one surefire laugh, and that lies in hanging some piece of idiocy upon the people of a nearby city or town.

I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.

The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.