Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
I never eat before breakfast.
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas