How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a quart?

Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, "You can't cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!

I must have a drink of breakfast.

I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

I like children - fried.

The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!

Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed.