There are better things than sex, but nothing quite like it.

Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.

I drink therefore I am.

Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?

I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.