I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.

Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas

I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.

Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch.

If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.

If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.

I never eat before breakfast.