I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
It's what you do that counts and not what you say; therefore I fired my press agent.
I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
All Englishmen talk as if they've got a bushel of plums stuck in their throats, and then after swallowing them get constipated from the pips.