The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!

Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck

I would rather be living in Philadelphia.