I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.

Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, "You can't cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!

There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.

Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.

When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.