Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.

I never met a kid I liked.

Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!

It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.

I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.

If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.

I'd rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42.